Tell You Everything You Wanted Someone Else To Say
by brokenanchor
Summary: This is crap. I know it's crap. I'm trying to fix said crap. So please for the love of the kittens and Spike don't read it. Please think of the kittens.
1. Chapter 1: From What I See

**Disclaimer: I do not own!**

**Warnings: non-monogamy, male/male ships, female/female ships, male/female ships, smut, non-consent, and illusion of character death. (more will be added as needed as this is a WIP)**

* * *

Tell You Everything You Wanted Someone Else to Say

Ch 1: From What I've Seen

Ron, Hermione, Harry, and Ginny all wave good-bye. A slow wave of someone not quite in the moment. A light mist hovers as tears brim Mrs. Weasley's eyes. She clutches her purse on the platform watching them go. The last ride to Hogwarts on the train for the "golden trio," because only Ginny will go back next year.

Hermione sighs as she turns around to look for an empty compartment. Silence fills the train before Hermione hears an echo of footsteps behind her. Empty compartments greet her and her friends first, but she waits until she spots one with people in it.

She knows it was silly, but she had begun to feel like she was in the twilight zone. Groaning inwardly, she wonders if she really was the only students to show up wearing school robes just like Ron proclaimed. She heads into the compartment next to the other passengers trying to shake off the image of other students in normal clothes and her guilt. Not many students are going to Hogwarts this year so she really didn't have much to be compared to. Last year, a fight had happened at school after all. This was a fact that scared many parents, who did have a reason to be scared. Voldemort. Parents only wanted to keep their kids safe. Yes, she didn't think kids were safer at home--only closer to their parents. Though there was nothing wrong with that.

Once everyone was seated, Hermione, unfortunately, has to head up to the front of the train to find out what was going to be expected of her as Head Girl.

"See. You're already leaving." Ron pipes in.

"I, honestly, can't believe you, Ron. It's not like I haven't been at the Burrow for most of the summer. But then you wouldn't notice. Would you? I mean, since you have been so bloody busy ignoring me. All because you think I won't spend time with you and Harry at school. I hope you think that's bloody brilliant plan. But I think you're bloody stupid." Hermione storms out without waiting for any kind of response.

But she can still hear him in the hallway as he yells. "You're a right bloody git. You know that."

Her mind goes back to when she received her hogwarts letter telling her the good news.

-

Hermione looked down at the letter to see what books she would need this year. She couldn't believe the words when she read them. She had been appointed Head Girl. She squeaked causing Ron and Harry to jump.

"Hermione?" They asked in unison.

"I…I made…I made Head Girl." She blushed as a smile plastered to her face.

"That's great Hermione." Harry exclaimed.

Ron whined. "Does that mean you won't be in the Gryffindor dorm?"

Hermione stepped back. "Is that what you think about first? Why can't you just be happy for me, Ron?"

Ron's ears turned red. "I thought we were going to spend most of this school year together looking for those Horcruxes. But you knew you were going to be made Head Girl, didn't you? Miss Perfect. You don't care about helping Harry out. You're just care about your grades at school! Next thing we know you'll be too busy doing homework, polishing your badge, and whatever it is Head Girls do and you won't have any time for us anymore."

"Ron. I. Am. Not. Your. Brother." She yelled before walking out.

Ron turned redder. "Piss off."

-

She's furious again as she whisks down the corridor. She doesn't know what Ron is thinking. She is beginning to get the impression that he doesn't care about her happiness. All that he seems to care about is what he gets to do with her. Not about any of her goals or desires. He just wants her by his side as his faithful little friend to make him feel wanted. She fights back the tears that threaten to fall. She gulps them down, telling herself that crying won't make any sort of good impression. Head Girl is, after all, what she had been looking forward to since she heard about the school. She wants to pinch herself. She still feels like she is dreaming. She had spent a lot of time in the library the previous years, and not just helping Harry with his adventures. Most of the time she used it for study and then that of course helped when she was looking for answers for Harry. She did end up knowing the library like the back of her hand, but then she ended up doing that with libraries. They always felt like home, a place where she could relax. But Ron didn't care about that. Anger washes over her. This is supposed to be the part where he was supportive and point out how good all her hard work had been. How everything had actually paid off. This is when he was supposed to celebrate with her. This is when he was supposed to notice her. This is when he was supposed to snog her, but he was too busy being a bloody prat. Her knuckles turn white as she continues stomping down the corridor.

She wonders who the head boy will be. She hadn't really paid that much attention to anyone else's grades. Well, besides Harry and Ron, but that was only because they kept asking for help on their homework. She doubts she'll give them any help this year—and they will probably ask. They always ask. Well, she decides if the only reason they need help is because of the Horcruxes then she really should help out, but not for _anything else_. Especially not Ron.

She's almost at the compartment when Draco steps out and bumps into her.

"Watch where you're going, filthy little Mudblood." Draco sneers.

Hermione draws herself up before looking down at Draco. "Really? Could you come up with something bloody original for once? Or are you really that simple? But then again, it would appear so. I mean, since you walk into me and then can't bloody well admit it. No, you have to curse at me instead. You spout of the same bloody trash as Voldemort." Draco's eyes widen. " Yeah. I bloody said his name. Do you want people to think you follow him? Do you want people to think you're a bloody hypocrite just like him? He's not a pureblood. But I bet you don't call him a half-blood or remind him in any way that he isn't a Pureblood. Just because you're simply not brave enough for that. Are you, Ferret? So why don't you bloody get. Out. Of. My. Way."

Malfoy's eyes widen farther as he lets out a gasp. He hadn't expected that. He takes the girl in as if seeing her for the first time, pondering and appreciating the strength that she suddenly showed. He wondered why the rest of the trio wasn't with her, but glad at the same time.

She didn't wait for him to move, but goes ahead and just walks into the compartment. She sees another boy, Zambini, sitting inside, but doesn't immediately recognize him. He is wearing silver and green robes though. She grins slightly as she realizes that Ron had been wrong--she wasn't the only one to show up in uniform. She just sizes this boy up as one of Malfoy's friends. She sits down across from him keeping her back straight and chin level. She closes her eyes wanting to try to relax before a professor walks in here to talk to both of them. She isn't bothered that she went off on Malfoy, but she doesn't want to say the wrong thing to a professor. She takes a few deep breaths before opening her eyes again. She looks across to the boy, who is staring back at her as if he finds something rather amusing. She wonders if he heard her altercation in the hallway, and turns slightly pink. He grins in response.

Headmistress McGonagall walks in breaking the silence. "Mr. Zambini and Miss Granger. I see the summer has treated both of you nicely. It is wonderful to see you. I hope that the two of you are ready for your duties and your studies this year. I also hope that both of you realize that you can come to me and talk about anything you may need to." She pulls her lips tight. "I am aware that the two of you are from rival houses, but you are Head Girl and Head Boy and I will not tolerate any...disharmony between the two of you. You are to present a unified front before the other students so that they may see how house differences do not mean two people can not get along. I hope I am being perfectly clear. Now, I know the two of you will not always agree, and that is perfectly fine. I would suggest discussing everything in private first before having meetings with the prefects, or make sure can calmly discuss your disagreements in public. Now, on top of the duties for prefects--and both of you have been prefects so I assume you do not need to be reminded-- I expect both you to hold weekly meetings with the prefects and keep an eye on them." Her face warms up a bit with a smile as she adds. "I expect both of you also to continue to be the model students that you are. When we get back, I will show the two of you to where you will be staying this year. If there are any questions, you may ask them at that time. Right now, I must go brief the prefects on their duties. Good day." With that she walks out.

Hermione turns to look at Blaise Zambini. He is still looking at the door, so she takes the time to really look at him. She is, after all, going to spend a lot of time in close proximity to him. She takes in his short dark brown hair. It_ looks _so soft, even his eyebrows. She grins a bit when she thinks that. The brown goes nicely with his blue eyes. Such pretty blue eyes looking so deep. His complexion is smooth, and she wishes she had skin like that. She wore make-up to make hers look nice. But he doesn't have to. His lips also look soft and she wonders if he uses lip balm or if they just are like that. She uses lip balm, and also brushes her lips. She had begun to do a little bit in an attempt to look better, and noticed a difference. She's noticed she gets more attention from boys and girls. People are a little friendlier to her now. Not that Ron had or would notice. He wouldn't notice her until she was the last girl left_._ A scowl forms across her face as she thinks about Ron.

"Really, Miss Granger, that look doesn't fit you." Blaise gives her a playful grin. "I much liked the fire in your eyes better. That look you had when you came in here after yelling at Draco. But I always found that confidence looks good on a woman."

"Really. Why do you care?" She starts to feel her cheeks get warm. "Besides shouldn't you be upset that I yelled at your _friend?_"

He keeps grinning. "Aw. Are you not used to receiving compliments, Miss Granger? I would like to get along with you this year just like the Headmistress suggested. I'm sure you don't want to disappoint her. And as for Draco. It's not liked you lied. But he probably didn't expect you to think anything along _those_ lines. I also would not lie to him or coddle him, and he knows it. It's why we are such good friends. Now, that is something that I won't change. He will be coming over to visit, and as much as I enjoyed you yelling. I must ask you to restrain yourself in the future. I'm not asking that you be friends. And before you say anything, he will know better than to start a yelling match with you. Remember: we are supposed to be _model students. _What do you want to talk about at the meeting tonight? I assume we should have the first get together tonight after the opening ceremony._"_ Hermione starts to glare at him.

She doesn'tlike the way he is talking to her. He probably just sees her as a weak little girl just like everyone else. She vows prove them wrong this year. Prove them all wrong. Besides, if Malfoy hadn't called her mudblood then she wouldn't have yelled at him. She could leave him alone. It was him that couldn't leave her alone. Selfish fool. He should have seen her. It's not like she's bloody invisible. She thought his pride does tend to get so inflated that he can't see around it. Either his pride or his hair. Though that blond hair always looks nice. Malfoy probably doesn't have to do anything with his hair. He probably just rolls out of bed with it looking nice. Unlike her, spending an hour getting ready each morning.

She looks across and sees Zambini still looking at her. Why is he still looking at her she wonders.

"What are you thinking in that head of yours, Granger?"

"What?!"

"Well, I can see the wheels in your head spinning but you still haven't said anything. Cat got you're tongue? Or were you lost in thoughts of your boyfriend?" He smirks with the last part especially as her face turns red.

"I don't know what you're talking about. I don't have a boyfriend." She turns her head to look out the door. "But I'm sorry. I forgot about your question. I think we should play some games tonight. You know, something to try and break the ice. We could split the prefects up so that we play guys vs. girls and that way we have equal number from each house on the teams. What do you think?"

"Sounds nice. Except for then the boys side will have two Slytherin and the girls will get two Gryffindors. However, split by gender, the teams might be able to compensate. I'm up for it. I wonder if making it a competition between genders will actually make them forget about houses for a little bit? What do you think, Granger?"

"Exactly." Her face lights up. "I think Pictionary would be fun."

* * *

**A/N: This chapter was up before, but has been edited and mistakes corrected thanks to stretchingthelimits. I'm so glad she beta'd this. Also I will try to keep the updates regular, but unfortunately no promises as things have a tendency to get in the way. Of mice and men... **

**Please review. Feedback is love.**

**-Broken Anchor**


	2. Chapter 2: Take You In

**Disclaimer: I do not own!**

**Warnings: non-monogamy, male/male ships, female/female ships, male/female ships, smut, non-consent, and illusion of character death. (more will be added as needed as this is a WIP)**

* * *

Ch 2: Take You In

Hermione hears a knock on the portrait door as she pours over some books. She's looking for anything that has to do with Horcruxes. And she's disappointed since Harry, Ron, and her found nothing over the summer. Despite all their attempts and now they didn't have any more leads to follow. She had thought it best if they went back to Hogwarts for their seventh year because the library would useful. The selection of books is quite extensive. Also the likelihood of a Horcrux being at the school is very high. Though they didn't have any clue what to look for or where it could be. Hogwarts was the best place to start because Voldemorte had learned about Horcruxes within the walls.

Hermione has other reasons of course for wanting to come back to Hogwarts, but she didn't think Ron and Harry would understand. She didn't think they could understand how important the N.E.W.T.s are to her. She wants to do well. To be the best actually. And prove to herself that she can do anything. Have any career she wants, if she only knew which one that was.

A knock echoes through the common room, and she waits to see if anyone else will get it. But when she hears the knock a third time, she resolves to answer it herself. And she opens the door with her wand ready. After all, who would knock on her door? Ron is probably still angry, and Ginny had wanted to talk to Harry. A red-eyed Parkinson greets her on the other side. "Is Dr-Draco he-here?"

Hermione steps back. "I think he's in Zambini's room. You're more than welcome to look." As the other girl scoots into the room, she can see the tear-stained cheeks. "Are you okay?"

Pansy nods. "I ju-just wa-want to ta-talk to Dra-co."

Hermione watches as Pansy's chest heaves up and down but says nothing else as the girl walks over and raps on the door before entering. Remembering the open portrait door, Hermione shuts it before 

heading back to her books. Halting on her way when she hears Parkinson sob. She looks back at the girl before she can stop herself only to see the girl leaving.

"Parkinson, I thought you wanted to talk."

"He isn't here." Pansy reaches for the door.

"Wait." Hermione finds herself halfway towards the girl before she knows what she's doing. The girl looks so sad. She wants to do something. She has to do something. She turns the girl around wrapping her arms around the crying girl.

Pansy freezes not quite sure what to do. After a few moments, she lets out a long breathe relaxing into the girl's arms as the tears flow.

Hermione keeps Pansy in the embrace until the tears stop. The front of Hermione's shirt is soaked, but she doesn't seem to notice as she pulls Parkinson in closer. "I hope you feel better. A little at least. I always feel better after a good catharsis."

Pansy tries to nod but realizes she's smashed up against the other girl's breasts. Freezing as she wonders if the taller girl even notices. But time seems to stop. Shejust got dumped by a girl she thought liked her, and now. Oh, she doesn't know what she is thinking. This is nothing. Just some girl trying to make her feel better. And Granger probably just pities her. No harm in enjoying the hug. Right?

Hermione pulls back. "Are you feeling any better?"

"A bit." Pansy manages a meek nod. "I should probably head back to my dorm."

"Except that, now, it's past curfew."

"Oh…"

"So you should probably go ahead and just stay here." Hermione walks back to her bedroom. "Don't worry I got some extra pyjamas you can wear. You can sleep on my bed, besides it's bigger and a bit more comfy than the twins in the house dorms."

What? Wear her clothes? Pansy shakes her head. Hermione is just being nice. A nice oblivious tease.

"Parkinson, come on. You look exhausted." Hermione walks over grabbing the girl's hand. Gently leading the girl into her bedroom before handing over pyjamas. She changes into another pair as she continues to talk. "You can go ahead and climb into the bed if you want. I'm going to be up studying for a bit longer. So don't mind me at all." She sighs as peers at the other girl. Pansy seems slow to move and Hermione wonders what happened to make her so depressed.

Pansy stares at Hermione wondering how anyone could be so oblivious. She enjoyed watching the girl change she admits, but then realizes she's still holding the pyjamas in front of her. While the other girl is looking at her waiting for something, then she remembers that she's expected to change also. Her face flushes as she runs into the bathroom. Changing quickly before coming back out. But Granger had already gone back to studying and is apparently unaware of anything unusual. Pansy climbs under the covers scooting to one side to leave room for the other girl.


	3. Chapter 3: Wonder Why You Haven't

**Disclaimer: I do not own!**

**Warnings: non-monogamy, male/male ships, female/female ships, male/female ships, smut, non-consent, and illusion of character death. (more will be added as needed as this is a WIP, and I don't want to surprise someone with a squick)**

* * *

Wonder Why They Hadn't

Parkinson wakes up under warm blankets. She wiggles and squirms beneath them until she remembers that her covers aren't this soft. And for a moment she can't recall where she is, but then drags herself up looking around the room. Her eyes were drawn to the only light in the room, a lamp on Hermione's desk. The sight of the brown hair girl reminds Pansy where she is.

Pansy clears her throat. "Did you get enough sleep?"

"Oh, you're awake. I was just about to wake you myself. Just as soon as I finished with this page. That is. But didn't know when you usually wake up. Though I am feeling a little hungry, so I kind of wanted to grab breakfast in a few."

"I have no clue what time it is, but I'm up now." Pansy glances down at the space next to her. The covers looking mostly flat and untouched. She realizes the only reason to think Hermione moved at all was because the girl had changed clothes. She frowns. "Did you sleep at all?"

"Er. No." Hermione picks up her books quickly as if she has to leave the room this instant. "I usually don't sleep the night before the first day of school. Nothing to worry about. It's normal for me. I get too nervous and excited to sleep." The words rush out her mouth as she picks up pieces of parchment. "I'm going down to the Great Hall. I'll see you later, Parkinson." She nods as she jets out the door. Not certain why she just told Pansy all that. It wasn't something that had ever come up around Harry or Ron, and not even Ginny for that matter. So why had she told Pansy, a girl who she barely knew?

Pansy stays still for a moment absorbing what the girl said before collapsing back onto the bed. She thinks that was a terrific way to bollucks things up. She shouldn't have said anything. But how can anyone stay up all night studying? Wouldn't all the reading make the girl's eyes tired? Besides Hermione was studying before school even began, making Pansy decide that Hermione is strange.

On her way out, she catches Draco and Blaise sitting in the common room. An eerie quiet hovers in the room making her think they had just finished talking about her. It wouldn't be the first time. She wonders for a moment if they were just surprised that she walked in instead of actually talking about her. She glances between the two wondering where they were last night, and knows they arrived after curfew. Yet here they were dressed and ready to go before she was. They didn't even look tired, which is exactly how she felt. Tired and Numb.

Maybe it was because she didn't quite know why she wanted to finish school. Her scores wouldn't matter when her life had already been planned out for her for a while now.

Maybe it was because of love lost. Some things were not hers to give no matter what she wanted.

Or just maybe it was because of how much she cried last night. There had been so many tears in front of someone who had no reason to be nice to her.

She looks around meeting their eyes as if she could ask without words what they wanted. Blaise only shrugs while Draco looks confused, and strides over to her stopping few paces away. He takes a wide stance and sneers. "Did you spend all night with that Granger girl?"

"Why do you care?"

"I'm your fiancé."

"Not because you wanted to be."

"It still means something."

Pansy ignores him looking past him to Blaise. "Where were you two boys last night? _You_ weren't here."

Draco sneers. "Were we supposed to be, Pansy?"

"No." She sighs. "It just would have been nice, is all. But you weren't here and I was crying. Such a stupid thing to cry over. I should have known it wouldn't have lasted. I just didn't expect it to happen like that. I didn't expect that I would see it was someone else who made her happy. I didn't expect that there would be nothing that I could do."

"Even if you know. Rejection still hurts." Blaise replies. "I know how much you liked that Slytherin girl, but there are others."

"But what does that have to do with Granger?" Draco asks as Blaise rolls his eyes.

"She just saw me crying, but I think she just felt pity because then she hugged me. Then she only had me stay because it was past curfew. And which I noticed you still weren't back yet. But she'll probably just ignore me now because I had to go and say something stupid."

Fighting back the tears, she turns to leave. She continues to talk over her shoulder though. "Can't talk about it any more right now. I'm about to start crying. Again. I bloody hate crying. Besides classes are about to start, and it won't do to show up with a red blotchy face. Or else I would never hear the end of it. First day and all that."

* * *

**Thank you for reading!**

**Concrit/Feedback is welcomed and appreciated, but not expected :)  
**


	4. Chapter 4: Give You What You Need

**Disclaimer: I do not own!**

**Warnings: non-monogamy, male/male ships, female/female ships, male/female ships, smut, non-consent, and illusion of character death. (more will be added as needed as this is a WIP, and I don't want to surprise someone with a squick)**

**Betas: urafunny1 and smirkingmuse (Thank you!)**

* * *

  


Give You What You Need

Hermione skips dinner for the library. Ron and Harry hadn't been talking to her all day, making her desire to talk to them non-existent. Well, for the most part. She can't believe that they are being so stubborn. While she had expected it a little bit, she is still furious. Overall, she would prefer to be on speaking terms but didn't want to have a one-sided conversation or a screaming match. She decides not talking to them would be easier if she wasn't around them, and thus, the necessity of a trip to the library. The books are comforting. The smell is like a warm blanket that makes her feel safe. She would always grin as she touched the pages. The texture is comforting, and the older the book, the better. Each new book is a new adventure, a new lesson, a new love.

At breakfast and at lunch, she had a book propped up before her while she ate. Multi-tasking seemed like the best way to get everything done. Well, she had tried to eat, but she found she wasn't that hungry.

She trades out some books at the library. She wonders if she'll actually manage to read the whole library at this rate. She sighs. She only uses this approach because she wasn't really sure where to look, but the history books seemed like a good start. The past repeats itself, and they had helped her out in the last few years, especially Hogwarts: A History. Besides, it was as good a place to start as any. But when she makes it back to her dorm, she is exhausted. Three Slytherins escape notice as she shuffles into her room. Too many thoughts cloud her brain. If only she had something to go on. Some piece of information to point her in a direction. She sits down at her desk, pulling out her homework from today. Maybe, she thinks,she'll feel better with a task completed. A task that has clear instructions and requirements. Also, it's better to not procrastinate.

Pansy knocks on the door before stepping inside. "Um, Hermione?"

The girl leans back in her chair. "Yes?"

"Thank you for last night."

"Oh, no problem." She sits up scribbling on a piece of parchment before placing the quill between her teeth.

"Did you get anything to eat?"

"What?"

"Well, I...uh...noticed you weren't at dinner, so I was wondering..."

"Oh, I wasn't hungry."

"Are you hungry now?"

"Not particularly." Hermione places the quill back on the parchment.

"Oh." Pansy turns to leave.

"Wait," Hermione sighs. "Why did you notice I wasn't at dinner?"

Biting her lip, Pansy turns back. "I...I just wanted to," she winces, "To thank you." She squeezes her eyes shut.

"Oh, it was no big deal," Hermione pauses to look up. "Are you feeling any better at least?"

"Doesn't hurt as much."

Hermione nods, "Do you want to talk about it?"

"Not really. I mean, I liked someone, but they...they liked someone else."

"Oh...well, at least you know."

Pansy nods, "Yeah, but it's still hard to talk to them or be in the same room..."

"It will get easier. And feel free to talk to me about it if you want to. Anytime."

"Thanks. At least, I'm done crying. Or, I think I'm done crying."

"Don't worry. You'll find someone else. You're pretty and smart. I'm sure that part won't be hard. You might even have to fight off your admirers with a stick."

"Really? You think that?"

"Yep."

Pansy hugs the other girl before looking down at the parchment. "Are you starting that already? It's not due for a month."

"Oh," Hermione blushes as she adjusts the open book. "I like to take my time on things, and I don't want to fall behind. Besides, procrastination doesn't help anyone."

"But we've only had one day of class. How far behind can you possibly get?"

"I just like to start early- if you _don't_ mind."

"Hermione, I'm sorry. I'm just surprised is all. I thought he was the only one who did that."

"Who?" She looks up puzzled.

"Draco."

"Oh," she says, looking even more confused. She hadn't expected him. The memory of calling the boy stupid on the train comes back. The way he had looked as her was...strange. She shakes the memory off.

"So...do you want anything to eat?"

Her stomach gurgles at the idea, and she giggles, "Well, I guess I do."

"Any requests?"

"Uh, no." She watches as Pansy scurries out the door, shaking her head before returning to her essay.

She hardly notices when Pansy comes back in, except that her stomach gurgles again. This time she can feel how empty it is. She hasn't eaten much all day. When she looks up, she sees a table set for two. Her stomach churns.

"What did you get?" She scoots over to the chair closest to her, before looking over at Pansy.

"I got some sandwiches and tomato soup."

"Grilled cheese?"

"Yes."

"How did you..."

"Oh, the kitchen, of course."

Hermione gulps as she leans back. "House elves. House elves made this?"

"Well, yeah. Just like all the other food we eat. Except, when I said your name, a peculiar house elf became very insistent that he make it himself. The house elf was muttering something about thank you for all the hats, and I think he was wearing all of them."

Hermione giggles, "Dobby."

"Does that mean you will eat then?"

Hermione nods, "I am a little famished."

Pansy rolls her eyes. "Sorry to pull you away from your books, for something boring and uninteresting like eating."

Hermione bites her lip. Pansy is just trying to be nice."Uh, thanks."

"For being boring and uninteresting?" she grins.

"No, silly. For the food."

The Slytherin smirks, "So now I'm silly-looking?"

Hermione blushes, "I didn't...I didn't say that." She looks down at her food, thankful for the distraction. Besides, the food is her favourite.

She waits until she's full, before looking back up. "Thanks. I needed that little break."

Pansy looks puzzled. "Are you going back to studying?"

"Yeah. What are you going to do?"

"Sleep." She shakes her head. "It's bloody late."

"You're welcome to stay here again. I mean, I don't mind. It's the least I could do, since you brought me food and all. Plus, it's past curfew, again." Why ask her? She knows it's polite and all, but the other girl is going to notice when she doesn't sleep. Pansy is probably going to ask again, why Hermione isn't sleeping, but she doesn't know what to say to that. Ugh. She'll just deal with it then. Right now.

Right now, she thinks she should go over the books she checked out for any sort of clues. Needle in a damn haystack, is what it bloody feels like.


	5. Chapter 5: Just One More

**Disclaimer: I do not own.**

**Warnings: non-monogamy, male/male ships, female/female ships, male/female ships, smut, non-consent, and illusion of character death. (more will be added as needed as this is a WIP, and I don't want to surprise someone with a squick)**

**Beta: smirkingmuse (Thank you!)**

**Thank you for the reviews!**

* * *

Just One More

Pansy wakes up in Hermione's bed for the second time, not surprised to see the girl still sitting at her desk pouring over a book. A quill taps in even beats on the desk. How long can this girl go without sleeping? Can't ask this time. She'll just leave in a hurry yet again. Or worse?

"Hermione?"

"Huh?"

"Do you want to go down to breakfast together?"

"Oh, what time is it?"

"O-fuck-a-clock in the morning."

"What?!"

"Sorry, I think it's bloody early." She looks down at her watch. "6 a.m."

"Do they have breakfast this early?"

Pansy shrugs, "We still have to get ready though. Amusing as going to class in pyjamas is...I don't think they'll let us."

Hermione blushes, "Um. Sure. Do you want to use the shower first?"

Pansy smirks, "Not finished with the chapter yet?"

Hermione's head snaps up. How did she know? Are her actions that predictable?"Maybe."

Pansy rolls her eyes, talking over her shoulder as she goes into the bathroom, "Just so you know. It doesn't take me _that_ long to get ready."

The Way They Talk to You

Hermione finds herself leaving the dining hall alone. When Ron and Harry had seen her walk in with Pansy, they had promptly decided not to talk to her. The two quickly separate with a hug before heading to their House tables. Ron mutters something about 'consorting with the enemy,' and she rolls her eyes before grabbing a piece of bread and leaving. She didn't really feel like hanging around him at the moment. Really, he could stop singing the same tune. Why does he only want her when she's spending time with someone else? Why not when she is with him?She shakes her head.

There is still a little bit before class, so she decides to go back to the library. She would have some time to look at the reference books for a little bit.

She doesn't notice when Crabbe and Goyle round the corner until one of them trips her. Books sprawl over the floor. The thud of the books echoes down the hall.

"Filthy Mudblood," Goyle adds pushing her down.

She collapses on her hands and knees. Anger rises inside her. Anger warms her up. Anger gives her strength. She had thought Ron and Harry were the last two boys she wanted to see right now, but she was wrong.

Scurrying forward, she turns around to face her attackers. The two Slytherin boys look pretty smug with themselves as they advance towards her.

She doesn't back up. Doesn't back down as she pulls out her wand. She lets her anger build up around her. The air thickens. She isn't running.

The two boys don't look disappointed- only more eager. Crabbe sneers as he and Goyle get their wands ready. "What are you going to do now? "

Goyle imitates her voice, "Run and tell Potter."

Quietly, she casts a spell at both of them, sending their wands flying. They smirk in response. Not bothered by the lack of magic. They only move closer before Crabbe backhands her, "You insufferable..." A cut left on her cheek. The blood drips down, but she stands firm. She knows now why Crabbe wore that ring of his.

Goyle punches her as he finishes for his friend, "...little bitch." Blood squirts out of her nose, but she ignores it. Her nostrils flare. What the hell are they thinking? How the hell do they think they'll get away with this?

They're not getting away with this.

She feels something surge through her as the boys fly back against the wall. She uses her wand then to cast a body bind on both of them, before picking up their wands. She snaps the wands in half before tossing the pieces back at the two boys.

Her anger is still flaring as she turns around to see Malfoy. "What do you want?"

He stands there, mouth open, unable to talk.

"Are you going to go tattle on me now, Malfoy?" she intones mockingly.

He shakes his head looking a little puzzled, "They deserved it."

The two boys whine. Their eyes plead with Draco, before they turn and glare at Granger. She smirks in response.

With a wave of her wand, the books straighten themselves and fly over to her. She grabs them before turning on her heels, leaving a trail of tiny droplets blood as she goes.

* * *

**Thank you for reading!**

**Concrit and feedback are much appreciated. :)**


	6. Chapter 6: Make You Like the Way

**Disclaimer: I do not own.**

**Beta: smirkingmuse (Thank you!)**

**Thank you for the reviews!**

* * *

Make You Like The Way

She shows up to class with a bruised cheek and a bandage over her nose. Ron's jaw drops as he sees her, and Harry interjects, "What the hell happened, Hermione?"

"So, now, you _want_ to talk to me. Is it because you want to play the hero or something, Harry?"

"Well, you hang out with a Slytherin, and then you get beaten. Not like that is a surprise. I mean, what are you doing with Pansy? She's in Slytherin. Besides, what do you expect me to think?"

Malfoy runs his shoulder into Potter as he walks past. "Pansy had nothing to do with it, you bloody half-wit."

Harry whips around to face him, "But I'm sure _you_ did."

The blond puts a hand to his chest pretending to be wounded. "Wrong again, Potter. Just because I'm not ignorant of the event, doesn't mean I had anything to do with it. Besides, why the hell are you yelling at _her_? Hero, my arse. What kind of hero yells at a girl for getting hit? Did you even try to figure out what happened?" His face shows utter disgust before sitting down. "I'm glad we didn't become friends first-year. You're such a fickle arse."

Potter gulps as he plops down. He turns back to Hermione with a look of horror. "Are you hanging out with him now, too?"

Hermione narrows her eyes at Harry and Ron. "Are you jealous?" She sits down by herself. While she is getting ready for class, Malfoy's words echo in her head. Did Malfoy just... She shakes her head as she looks up. The blond in question is looking at her, but she can't make out his expression.


	7. Chapter 7: Lay All Your Troubles Down

**Disclaimer: I do not own.**

**Beta: smirkingmuse (Thank you!)**

**Thank you for the reviews!**

* * *

Lay All Your Troubles Down

When Hermione gets back to the common room, Pansy walks up to her. "Draco told me about Crabbe and Goyle."

Hermione winces before looking away. "Do you want to stay over again?"

The Slytherin girl blinks, "Yes."

When Hermione turns back, her eyes pierce the other girl. "Are you avoiding someone?"

Gulping, the girl nods.

"You won't be able to avoid them forever, but it will get easier."

The girl nods. "I know," she sighs as she looks down.

Hermione wraps her arm around the girl before leading her back to her quarters.

"Hermione?"

"Yes?"

"I'm sorry about Crabbe and Goyle."

"Did you have anything to do with it?"

The girl shudders, "No."

"Then why are you sorry?"

Pansy looks down at her feet, "Because- what Harry said. I mean, I understand if you don't want to be seen with me."

"Don't worry about Harry," she rolls her eyes. "He is just jumping to conclusions, like he usually does."

"But doesn't he usually figure things out."

Hermione chuckles, "Only when the facts have had time to settle for a while. Or when it's bloody obvious. Or when someone else figures it out, and then tells him. Usually Dumbledore explained things to him." Her voice gets softer. "Or I did."

"But I get the impression, He isn't really talking to you."

Hermione's shoulders drop. "He isn't."

"Why?"

"Because I'm Head Girl."

"Wait...What?!"

"I'm Head Girl. I'm not in the Gryffindor dorms. Instead, I'm sharing a tower with a Slytherin, which amounts to sharing a tower with the _enemy_. I'm not giving them answers to homework, or in their search for...er...a way to defeat Voldemort. So they kicked me out of the Mystery Team."

"They kicked you out of what?"

"The Mystery Team. A group of kid detectives from a Muggle show."

"I don't know whether or not to be proud that they consider the Slytherins the enemy," she snorts. "Though it is kind of funny."

"Ron thinks that all the Death Eaters came from Slytherin. But only _most_ of them did."

"Oh," she bites her lips. "We, Slytherins, do tend to be sneaky. And most of us are Purebloods." The raven-haired girl shudders. "Doesn't mean we have the same ideals. Just the same traits." She runs her fingers through her hair. "But you said Head Girl first."

"I did." Hermione sits down on the edge of the bed.

"Were they upset about that first?" Pansy looks over, studying Hermione's face.

Hermione glances away as a single tear falls down her face.

"Oh, Hermione." Panys wraps an arm around the girl. "Do you want me to kick their arses?"

Chuckling, Hermione leans her head onto Pansy's shoulder.

"They should be happy for you. Usually a Ravenclaw or Slytherin makes Head Girl. Not very many Gryffindors. "


	8. Chapter 8: With You

**Disclaimer: I do not own.**

**Beta: smirkingmuse (Thank you!)**

**Thank you for the reviews!**

* * *

With Me

Friday, Pansy finds Hermione at her desk studying. Yet again. The girl is in her pyjamas. Why did she change into them, if she doesn't sleep? "You've got all weekend to do that."

"I know."

Pansy rolls her eyes. At least, the girl made it down to dinner.She shakes her head. Sighing as she sets down on the bed. "Would you be adverse to taking a break?"

"I have a lot of homework to do." She scribbles some notes down as she talks.

"Hermione, we didn't get that much this week."

Hermione rests the quill on her bottom lip as she bends back over a book. "I'm taking more classes than you."

"Which has a lot to do with why you're head girl. But you can take a break, you know." She walks closer to the girl.

The girl sighs, "I know."

The Slytherin places her hands on the other girl's shoulders. She uses her hands to warm up the girl's neck before starting to massage. She watches as the girl's writing slows down. After a few minutes, the quill is abandoned altogether. Pansy continues and spreads out reaching further down the girl's back.

When Hermione moans, Pansy takes hold of her hand. Leading the girl over to the bed to lie down. The Gryffindor doesn't protest, and the Slytherin smirks at the thought before gently pushing the girl onto her stomach. She picks the massage back up. Glad that the girl's pyjamas weren't thick. She didn't want to the girl to think too much, because the girl might try to rationalize not taking a break again. Right now, she just wants the girl to relax. Besides, she doesn't know if she could behave with the other girl topless, and she doesn't want to be kicked out. Then, the whole point of the massage would be wasted. The point, she reminds herself, is not sneaking in a chance to put her hands on Hermione, but to try and get the girl to sleep.

Pansy switches to using only one hand, as she uses her wand to turn down the lights. It doesn't take that much longer for the other girl's breathing to deepen as the girl finally falls asleep.


	9. Chapter 9: Too Intimate

**Disclaimer: I do not own.**

**Beta: smirkingmuse (Thank you!)**

**Thank you for the reviews!**

* * *

9. Too Intimate

Hermione wakes up slowly. She wraps her arm tighter around the girl in front of her until she realizes it's Pansy.

She jerks back, toppling off the bed onto her arse. Words are stuck at the back of her throat as the previous night comes back to her. She had planned to ask what the bloody hell happened and how the hell did they end up in bed together, when she remembered it had only been a massage. _Only a massage_ she thinks. Then why did she wake up with her arm around the girl? It wasn't like they were naked, but still. Something had felt too intimate.

Her voice cracks, "Why?"

"You needed to sleep. I was worried."

Still not looking at Pansy, Hermione continues to stare at the floor. "I just-I just have so much to do. So much riding on me."

"But you need to sleep."

"I'm used to little sleep. I'm an insomniac, anyway."

"Love, it didn't take long for you to pass out."

Hermione drags her head up to look at the Slytherin. Her eyelids start to droop, and she notices the girl looks worried. _She _really is worried about me. Why does that make me feel better?

"Hermione, you still only slept a few hours. Please, for the time being, climb back into bed, and go to sleep. You can be mad at me tomorrow if you want. Please, Hermione. I can only help you as much as you let me. And I can help you now. And you don't have to tell me anything. But please, come back to bed." Pansy raises the blankets for the girl to climb under.

But when Hermione still doesn't move, she starts to climb out herself.

"Pansy."

"Yes?"

"Wait. Please stay."

"Are you going to sleep?"

"Yes."

"Good."


	10. Chapter 10: Going to Break You

**Disclaimer: I do not own.**

**Beta: smirkingmuse (Thank you!)**

**Thank you for the reviews!**

* * *

Going to Break You

Pansy wakes up before Hermione. She can feel the sleeping girl's breath on the back of her neck. The girl's arm is wrapped tightly around her.

The Slytherin wonders what it means but does not linger too long on the thought, because she only wants to enjoy it. Enjoy the simple touch of the other girl. It makes her feel wanted. Her heart races at the thought.

She doesn't even know if Hermione likes girls, much less her. Besides, the way she reacted earlier was a good indication that she didn't.

Pansy sighs. She doesn't really want to move. The thought of lying there, wrapped up in blankets and the beautiful Gryffindor is too appealing. She can't take another reaction like before. It felt too much like rejection.

She slowly slips out, careful not to disturb the other girl, ignoring the pain in her chest.

She turns back to look at the girl before opening the door. The girl is sleeping so peacefully and looks so beautiful.

Pansy is filled with an overwhelming desire to crawl back into bed with the girl. Yet, fear grips her again as the image of Hermione toppling off the bed replays in her mind. She sees the shock and anger on the other girl's face, and her resolve quickens as she hastily leaves.

Barely managing a stealthy exit, she leans back against the bedroom door as tears fall down her cheek. Knees buckle underneath her as she covers her face. She really can't continue to do this. She wonders if she should make herself scarce until she knows how she would be accepted. If she could even figure something out like that.

Her fingers weave into her hair pulling it back as she sobs in quiet jerks, before she feels someone reach down and hold her. She recognizes his scent. She breathes it in, and is reminded of a warm summer night as she opens her eyes to see Blaise, and to her surprise, Draco.

"How long have you been here?"

"The whole time. Pansy, what happened?"

"Draco, you're good at charms, right?"

"Yes, but-"

"Can you put a charm on her room to make it quiet?"

"Yes, but-"

"Can you also dim the light from the windows?"

"Yes, but why?"

"Please. Draco."

He rolls his eyes but performs the spells, anyway.

She continues, "Draco, she hasn't slept all week until I tricked her last night."

Blaise helps her up as Draco looks perplexed and clarifies, "Draco, I'm guessing Hermione didn't take it well, and for some reason, she is asleep right now."

Pansy twists her fingers. "Right." The girl starts pacing as she recants the night's events to the two boys.

They don't get a chance to react as someone knocks on the portrait door as soon as she finishes. A very persistent knock on the portrait door.

Draco yanks open the door. "What!?"

A red-faced Weasley stands next to Potter who asks, "What are you doing here, Malfoy?"

"Potter, I believe that is my question to you and your incessant banging. Didn't either of you learn manners wherever it is you came from? Surely, you couldn't have been that poor."

Ron huffs, looking at Harry.

"Fine, Malfoy. Is Hermione here?"

"Yes, Potter." Blaise and Pansy step up behind Draco, flanking him and blocking the Gryffindors from entering.

Harry rolls his eyes, "Can we see her?"

Draco continues to talk for the Slytherins, "No, Potter. She's sleeping."

"Well, wake her up."

"No."

"It's bloody important."

"Like her sleep isn't. Not that you would notice, but she hasn't slept all week. But then, you are the boy-who-had-his-head-up-his-arse."

Ron steps forward, "And how would you know?"

"Because unlike some people," Draco looks at the Gryffindors with disgust. "I pay attention."

The red-head seethes. "What did you do to her, Malfoy?"

"I didn't do anything to your Mudbloo-"

Pansy grabs Draco's shoulder, jerking him towards her. _Smack_. Her hand flies across his face.

Blaise smirks before he addresses the Gryffindors in the hallway. "This is one lovers' quarrel you don't want to see." Then slams the door on them.


End file.
